just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Randomize
