He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
