So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
