People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
