Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
