What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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