If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
