i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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