So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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