Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I wish i was in the wii world.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize