Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
