I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i wish my penis had a tongue
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize