We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
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