i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
