I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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