I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
