Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I am mentally ready for anal.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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