Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
he high fived his dick after we had sex
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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