we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Randomize
