Grow some girl-balls and come out already
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
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