shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
