Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
