She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
