So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize
