Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
