I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize