is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
