ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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