Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
