like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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