You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
