My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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