You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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