Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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