ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
