well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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