Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
