Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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