no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
