do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
