Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize