My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Randomize