it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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