she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I just forgot I was standing up.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
