He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
