Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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