I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
