He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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