She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
