im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
