There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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