I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Randomize
